Groundskeeper Christa

It's like soup outside. I HATE humidity, and I hate the constant battle I have to wage versus my fluffy lion hair every day living here. I was supposed to mow my lawn tonight, and I when I walked outside after work it was that sort of bastard gray color. Dark. CRAP! I drove home as fast as I could, screeched into my garage, changed, let Sophie outside and then rushed to my (rented) lawn mower with Gogol Bordello on my iPod. I basically ran laps around my backyard while Sophie ran laps around me and the lawn mower until it started raining. There is now this annoying furry landing strip along the South edge of my back yard that I couldn't get to in time. Being OCD, I almost think it's better to have not mowed at all. I have to make an effort to not look out my back windows until it is dry enough to mow again or that furry landing strip might be the death of me. How can anyone take care of their lawn in this state? I made a 95-degree rule earlier in June. If at any point in time during the day, it gets hotter than 95, my lawn isn't getting mowed and my neighbors can suck it. With the rain, this means that since I've moved here (April 1), I've mowed my lawn probably six times. My one next door neighbor made the helpful suggestion that I get up early to mow my lawn when it is less hot. He apparently doesn't understand my night-owlishness and my propensity to stay up to stupid hours of the night entranced by reruns of Law & Order that I've probably seen 10 times anyway. I am NOT a morning person. Anyway, I thought I would enjoy working in my yard, considering I like green stuff and being outside and junk. I also like the smell of grass when it is not masked by puppy land mine death stench. I HATE humidity, however. My thermostat is set at 70, and I am staying inside. I did what I could, little lawn. You can keep your landing strip until next week.